2011 Blogs - Blog Archives - Indiana University East

Thanks For the Memories

06/07/2012

Well I’m here at that moment of intense reflection, looking back on this past year and everything I’ve done. I have just finished my last final and therefore have officially finished my Junior year of college and I’m not quite sure how I feel about it. I know I’ve said it many times before, but if you told me I would be sitting here at my desk, in my newly emptied-out room in England a year ago, I definitely wouldn’t have believed you, or could have even imagined it. I was looking through my old blogs the other day and not only was I thankful to have had an opportunity to document my year through IUE, but I was kind of in awe of the change I see from the girl who wrote her first blog in August to the chick (I’m really not going to call myself a woman yet, I’d feel too pretentious) I am now, writing this final blog. You can feel the naivety in my approach and attitude toward the things I was writing about. I had no clue, and I’m not saying that I’ve miraculously turned into the all-knowing, but I can definitely say with a straight face that I can survive and adapt to situations I would have never been able to before, case in point: Canterbury.

For reasons still unbeknownst to me, I decided to apply to the Canterbury program that night/morning in January (it was like 4am, I think?) thinking “Oh! I bet it would be so cool to live in England! I love Harry Potter? And the Spice Girls were pretty cool…” I’m still not sure where that random idea came from, but it came so I just went with it. From me applying the day the application was due, to me getting accepted, to me getting caught up in a whirlwind of paperwork and visa appointments, me actually getting to England seemed to be a distant prospect. THEN when I finally did get here, the thought of me leaving for good seemed to be even more faraway. I just remember feeling so lost when I got here, and I don’t think anyone can comprehend what I mean when I say that. I didn’t know how to get around, where to shop, how to budget, etc. I mean, my itty bitty town in Ohio is all I have ever known and I can’t deny that I have lived a very, very comfortable life. I left my home feeling like a big fish in a little pond and when I got here I wasn’t even a fish egg, I was just a little girl from a littler town in a sea of people. Now, my situation was kind of unique compared to the other IU students I came over here with because I have never been to a school that had more than 4,000 kids or lived more than 20 minutes away from my parents; I was a definite rookie in the ‘typical’ college sense. So when I started classes and had to find my way around a campus fit for almost 20,000 students I was overwhelmed. The classes were out of my major and forced me to think in ways I never had to before and the classrooms were sometimes even more difficult to find, especially if you were in Rutherford. I remember feeling so defeated and like such a moron because I wasn’t catching onto the whole concept of English University life. But after about a month here, I was comfortable enough to tell myself to shut up and suck it up. I was making friends from all over the world, my housemates were amazing and I was learning so many new things in all of my courses, especially the ones that had nothing to do with Biology. I felt like I was starting to get a grasp on everything, and that felt unbelievably satisfying; I was doing it and all on my own. Now, I feel more comfortable with change. I understand that I am just a small piece in a giant puzzle and I enjoy knowing that, because until you really get out and gather new experiences for yourself, by yourself, you’ll never grasp that concept. I truly feel, now, that everyone, at least once in their life, needs to get kicked in the butt and knocked down, because feeling small helps you to grow bigger than you can imagine, and believe me, I know, Canterbury freaking kicked me in the face when I first got here, HARD. I know I’m just 21 and still have so much to experience and so many more annoying inspirational quotes to conjure up, but moving to another continent on my own was one of the scariest, most difficult and gut-wrenching things I have ever done, but most of all, it was one of the best decisions of my life.

J4L

This year is one I will look back on continuously because it was literally the best year of my life, filled with the best travels, learning experiences and people I could ever hope for. Saying goodbye to the people who have become my family will be the hardest thing about leaving tomorrow. I know I’m obviously biased, but I think I was blessed with the best group of friends here. I feel like I have known them for ages, and looking back on all of our absolutely insane experiences and nights out together, I feel like the luckiest girl, ever. The kindness and generosity extended to me from complete strangers has made me a better friend and overall, a better person, and I can safely say that these people will continue to be in my life forever. I cannot express enough how thankful I am for this experience and even though I cannot wait to go to Meijer and Wal-Mart when I get to America, if I could, I would stay in this house, with my Denstead family forever. To Denstead 1,2 and 3, forget travelling and learning, you guys were the ones who made my experience this year worthwhile and the gratitude I have for you all is indescribable. I love you more than I can say, and in true Beyonce fashion, “If I ain’t got nothing, I got YOU….EH.” Cheers for the year everyone and thanks for everyone who has followed and read my blog! I was the newbie, so I hope you enjoyed and could cope with my run-ons and rants! And with that, to my English family and everyone reading I say….White Beyonce: OUT!! xx